WEDNESDAY: Locals Only
Guidebooks that treat Brooklyn as a destination in its own right rather than an afterthought to Manhattan are few and far between, so we really appreciate Not for Tourists’ attempt at distilling our hoods into one concise guide. Come celebrate the 2010 edition of their Brooklyn book–and its accompanying iPhone app–at Brooklyn Bowl with a party full of freebies and Brooklyn love. Show up between six and eight for a copy of the new book, a free drink, and free bowling, as well as the chance to win prizes from borough mainstays like Cafe Grumpy and Spoonbill and Sugartown.

THURSDAY: Five-Course Franks
If your Bark hot dogs routinely disappear before your eyes, savor your favorite franks at Bark and Sixpoint’s gourmet fast food/local brew feast. The five-course meal is $40 per and includes pairings like Crispy Pork with Spicy Pickled Chili Mayo and Bark Red Ale, one of two Sixpoint beers you can’t get anywhere else. (Take home your favorites in $12 growlers!) Reservations are required for the 6:30 and 9pm seatings (718-789-1939).

Humor Section
Laugh it up at Greenlight Bookstore as the shop inaugurates its comedy series Steamboat, a fusion of stand-up and readings by some of the city’s best humor writers. The evening’s lineup features Josh Lieb, a producer of The Daily Show, 30 Rock and Bored to Death writer Tami Sagher, and Gabe Liedman, host of VH1’s Best Day Ever. The night starts at 7:30pm. RSVP on Facebook.

SATURDAY: Knitting Factory Aflame
We at BB have been keeping our eye on Todd Goldstein’s solo project, ARMS, for the past few years. The former Harlem Shakes guitarist has been winning deserved acclaim for his first full-length, Kids Aflame, and just recently opened for Passion Pit at a sold-out show at Terminal 5. Now, he’s headlining his own gig at the Knitting Factory, and opening for him is a local favorite of ours, In Cadeo. ARMS’ mix of sweetly melodic tunes and passionately anthemic rock songs makes this the perfect date night for bespectacled indie kids looking for their own Garden State moment.

Invisible Dog Unveils “The Ant”
Stop by The Invisible Dog in Cobble Hill this Saturday between 6 and 9 for the unveiling of the new art center’s most ambitious project yet. “The Ant” by Xavier Roux is an 18-meter (that’s 60 feet, people) long ant with legs made of construction-grade steel and a body of stiff, white nylon balloons. “The Ant” was inspired by the well-known French children’s poem by Robert Desnos: “an 18-meter ant with a hat on its head/That doesn’t exist, that doesn’t exist!” Unstated in the poem is the poet’s tragic history: Desnos was a resistance fighter who was eventually sent to the concentration camps, and the 18-meter ant refers to the 18-meter train cars used by the Nazis for transport. Finding a space hospitable to such a major installation was a coup for Roux, who has dreamt of this project for years. The results are simply breathtaking.

SUNDAY: Gotham Grub
Late last year Jonathan Deutsch and Annie S. Hauck-Lawson published a book with appeal to foodies and historians alike: Gastropolis, an exploration of New York’s food history from its 17th-century beginnings to its diverse culinary culture of today. Deutsch, a professor and classically trained chef, hosts a panel discussion on the same topic at the central branch of the Brooklyn Public Library at 1:30pm.

MONDAY: Bike Talk
Everyone’s got an opinion on what Open City Dialogue has so appropriately deemed the Great Williamsburg Bike Wars; ever since Satmar activists successfully got the Williamsburg bike lane closed, and local activists took it upon themselves to repaint the lane, the war of words and protests has been nonstop. Tonight’s event brings civility to the discourse, with a free debate between both sides. Caroline Samponaro, the director of bicycle advocacy at Transportation Alternatives, and Heather Loop, a bike messenger who organized a protest in support of the lane in December, will be speaking for the bike lane supporters, while Isaac Abraham, a City Council candidate, will be standing up for the local Hasidim. The debate will be moderated by a man with a foot in each world, Baruch Herzfeld, who runs a bike loan program for Williamsburg Satmars.

For the Good of the Gowanus
Before the Bell House revived the Gowanus-area nightlife, the non-profit Gowanus Canal Conservancy was working to restore the Gowanus area itself. The two organizations join forces for the first annual Gowanus a Go Go concert, all proceeds of which go to the conservancy. Brooklyn indie-rockers Plushgun headline the night, which starts at 6:30pm. Should the concert pique your interest in the canal, head to the Proteus Gowanus gallery, which has just added new artifacts to its canal-centric Hall of the Gowanus.

BB DEAL: Healthier, Happier, Hotter…SIR!
Boot camps abound, but Captain Quinn’s Fitness Boot Camp is the only one we know run by a trainer who will make you laugh as you shed the holiday pounds. Designed by Captain Quinn, a former military drill instructor and Dick Swizzle’s private personal trainer, his fitness experience combines the camaraderie and results of military-style group workouts with school yard fun, and none of the scary stuff. Next classes begin on February 1st (Park Slope) and February 2nd (Brooklyn Heights), and Brooklyn Based subscribers are eligible for a special two week free trial! Select a location/time, and enter coupon code “BK-Based-0110″ to reserve your spot.

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Sent by Nicole, Casey and Nina. Photos from top via Bark, and by j. bautista, via Invisible Dog, and bitchcakesny.